This past weekend was a mixed bag. We had planned to go camping but the weather called for nothing but rain so we postponed for another weekend. Breen took several days off so we had a nice long weekend. But it also meant that we had to deal with my daughter and her difficult behavior. It's tiring to say the least. Anger is an interesting thing. I've always considered myself to be laid back and easy going. Still, as compassionate and calm and loving as we try to be, I believe that anger is in all of us; it's just a matter of reaching some kind of breaking point. I reached mine yesterday. I said some horrible things to my daughter and once I opened my mouth, it was like a dam broke and I couldn't put my finger in the hole to stop the flood of anger. I'm not proud of myself but she did manage to push every button inside of me. I'm trying to regroup today. I'm trying to come up with a strategy to keep my damn mouth shut. I can barely stand to look at her anymore, let alone keep my words inside when she starts up. It may take several rolls of duct tape...on myself. Yet through it all, I am grateful for so many things.
A full refrigerator with lots of delicious produce
A break in the weather...finally!
My husband
My health
My comfortable home
My love and passion for writing
I'm also excited because tomorrow marks a new face lift for my meatless blog. I'll be cooking my way alphabetically through some tasty dishes and offering an apron giveaway. The first "A" dish is something sweet and yummy.....
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http://madorganica.blogspot.com/ If you need some mother/daughter inspiration. Check out this blog. I love the way she writes about her girls.
ReplyDeleteJane, we have all had moments where we let all that frustration build up and then it spews like a volcano with no way to stop it! Maybe your daughter needed to see that her behavior has caused you some angst too. When I have had these eruptions with my sons I will go to them after cooling down and tell them that I am sorry for the way I handled my feelings, that it was wrong of me to blow up and that I could have and should have handled it better. My frustration however was genuine, it just needed to be dealt with better. It lets them know that we too are human, we make mistakes and it is always okay to admit that and apologize. I have raised sons who are not afraid to say the words 'I'm sorry' which cannot be said of many men today. May this be a moment of healing for you both!
ReplyDeleteEmotions are energy, if they are constantly stuffed down, the energy finds a way of escaping on it's own. We all need a way to control the pressure valve and let a little out as we go along.
ReplyDeleteI am afraid that I don't have a personal experience since my daughter still is very young, but I can tell you that my sister's teenager's years were brutal on my mom (and it trickle down to everyone very often). What I can tell you too, is that things get better. My sister is a mom of 4 now. She understands now. It may take awhile, but things will pass as well. Try to find your inner peace. Everyone needs that. Hope you feel better.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about you and your daughter. It happens to the best of us. This too shall pass. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteHang in there
ReplyDeletedaughter's and mom's become creatures of habit!
just remember this: the bond between and mother and daughter is LOVE
peace and hugs