What's engraved on your soul?

Last night I finished Kitchen by Banana Yoshimoto. I love her writing so much. There are obviously so many things being woven in to the story but one important thing is the main character's love of kitchens. Beyond just the preparation of food, she finds peace and warmth in kitchens. Each time she goes in to the kitchen, she finds small pieces of herself. then, I found this passage in the book:

"Why do I love kitchens so much? It's strange. Perhaps because to me a kitchen represents some distant longing engraved on my soul."

WHAM! It hit me hard as I remembered an experience I had this past Sunday. Breen and I went to the movies. As we walked to the theatre, we passed an old vintage sky blue VW mini bus in the parking lot. I stopped dead in my tracks. My heart was filled with the most intense aching and longing to get in that van and just drive and drive and drive. Mind you, not just ANY car would evoke this feeling. A vintage VW mini bus is my ultimate fantasy. It fits my personality to a tee. I imagine owning one and having it custom painted with a luggage rack installed on top and awesome white walled tires. And curtains hanging in the little windows...made by me of course! The real matter at heart here though is this long standing desire to hit the open road and have adventures. My deepest, truest self needs to know the vast world out there; not just the same old area I have lived in for my whole life. I've never lived anywhere more than 45 minutes away from where I grew up. I long to see other landscapes and meet quirky, colorful people. I long to come across little diners and local restaurants. New snapshots with my camera. Excavating new pieces of myself as the miles tick along. I want to be clear that this is NOT a feeling of "running away". Not at all. I love my life with my magnificent husband and kids. It's just that I've had this longing engraved on my soul for so long now that it's becoming hard to ignore. I need to find a way to have some little adventurous road trips....

What is it that's engraved on YOUR soul?

Wishcasting Wednesday: What do you wish to acknowledge yourself for?

What a great wishcasting prompt today! Lately, I've been "having some moments" with myself. I've always tended to beat myself up for my own perceived shortcomings and flaws. Frankly, it takes so much energy to behave that way and I am tired. I think the thing that frustrates me the most is that I KNOW deep down inside, where the true essence of me lives, there is an amazing woman beyond the ordinary. She wants to come out and stay and shine like a big full moon all the time. Today, I wish to acknowledge myself for:

Being a good mother and realizing that it hasn't been easy over the years raising them in some of the situations I found myself in BUT...I've always been here for them. Always.

Being a creative DIVA

Being a loving, loyal and supportive wife

Being smarter than I give myself credit for

Being loving, kind and compassionate

Being proactive about self-improvement when I see something I'd like to change

Tuesday

Today, I'm feeling a little swamped with my own feelings. I've been home all summer. During this time, I've been looking for work but admittedly I need to really step up the search. I've been really enjoying this time home. It's the first time in 13 years that I've been around for and with the kids. As much as I've enjoyed this break from working, I also desire to get back to some sort of work routine. Even the kids are ready to get back to a routine. Breen and I have goals and me being home does not serve us well if we actually want to achieve some of these goals. I love my creativity but I don't have a vision of it actually generating income any time soon. Etsy is one small avenue to sell, but even that is slow, slow, slow! Breen asked me this morning how my job search is going. It's the first time he's asked me in a long time. He is so loving and supportive but I know it weighs on his mind even when he doesn't ask. It made me realize that I need to get my ass in gear in such a bigger way. I owe it to him, myself and our marriage to step up to the plate. I never want to take any of my blessings for granted. Every day is a gift and I think at the end of each one, we have to ask ourselves what, if anything, we contributed or achieved.

I've finished a custom order apron for an artist who is opening her own studio/store front. I definitely had fun with this one!

Monday review

It's a gorgeous, perfect summer day today in the mid 80's with very little humidity. Finally a nice little break from the horrendous heat wave.

This past weekend we went to my brother's 50th birthday party. I know what you're thinking...it's amazing that such a young thing as myself has that old of a sibling lurking in the family tree, right? HA HA....seriously though, I really adore my brother. He's one of the funniest people I've ever known. We are 5 years apart. When I was growing up, I didn't have much in common with him but over the years we have developed such a great relationship.

Here's the birthday boy (holding court, as usual....he is a natural born salesman...wish I had that in me!)

This is my other brother (he's 2 years older than me):

My parents:

Husband extraordinaire:


This is a family tradition now. At family gatherings, my sister-in-law always gives me the finger when I take her picture. I even have one of her flipping me off at my wedding. Seriously, it's funny!

My niece's little girl can make you work for one of her charming giggles. But for Breen, it's no problem. Kids love him. I think he is going to be such a wonderful grandfather one day...but not TOO soon :)



So, what else is new around here?

1. I've finished a custom order apron
2. I've started Slaughterhouse Five by Vonnegut
3. I'm thinking up something good to make for dinner

Go over here to my food blog to get the 411 on this dish:

Saturday morning and a few Japanese things

Holy Cow, did we have some thunder and lightning last night! It's 9:15am and I'm loving my Saturday morning. It's still raining out and that makes it perfect for lounging around in my husband's dress shirt, sipping coffee, reading and sewing. I'm savoring all of this because by lunch time, we will be driving in the car for a few hours. Let me recap the morning:

Lounging around in Breen's shirt sipping coffee:


This morning I made two new cloth journal covers with some fabric I found yesterday. I'm absolutely IN LOVE with this fabric. The gorgeous lantern blossoms evoke the feeling of Japan for me. I still need to add some ties, but they're almost ready for my Etsy shop! Go on over here for a browse around The Painted House.



And speaking of Japan, yesterday I found these adorable sandals at the local Japanese store. This is the best $10 I've spent since San Diego!


I'm reading Goodbye Tsugumi by Banana Yoshimoto, a Japanese writer. Last night I came across a passage that literally floored me. I'm going to share it with you now:

Each one of us continues to carry the heart of each self we've ever been, at every stage along the way, and a chaos of everything good and rotten. And we have to carry this weight all alone, through each day that we live. We try to be as nice as we can to the people we love, but we alone support the weight of ourselves.

Here's the dinner Max made last night. He's an awesome cook and I try to encourage him to keep at it. Not only is preparing food a blissful experience, it opens one to the possibilities of trying all sorts of new things. I'm still committed to eating meatless and proud of myself for sticking to it. Everyone here raves about "Max's chicken". I'm sure I'm missing out on one hell of a culinary treat.

book worm and sarongs

Here's one sentence to describe me today: I am a book toting, sarong wearing slightly conventional woman. It's true. I'm back in to a reading phase and that means one thing; one book will not do. When I go to the library, they've got a little wagon reserved just for me to carry out all of my books :)) Here's a selected library review for you:

1. Kitchen by Banana Yoshimoto (If you don't know Banana, get yourself to the library NOW.)
2. Goodbye Tsugumi by Banana Yoshimoto
3. Slaughter House Five by Kurt Vonnegut (No need for introduction here)
4. Hocus Pocus by Kurt Vonnegut

I've also got books on CD and a big pile of books I own lined up.

I've owned sarongs in the past but I lost them in my last move. I bought 3 in San Diego and I have to say that this is a required summer garment for me. Incredibly versatile and perfect for this nasty heat wave. Make it a skirt or a dress...that's a lot of bang for the buck. In San Diego, I sat next to a woman at the beach who put elastic on hers and sewed it up. It made a fantastic strapless dress without the hassle of having to tie it up.


Today, I'm off to the Farmer's Market with my camera and my eye on some fresh produce. We've got a busy weekend ahead. It's my brother's 50th birthday and we are off to Maryland to toast the old geezer :)))) Thank God I'm still the baby of the family.

Art Sale (a new spin on the Yard Sale)

So, I've had this creative flash for a few months now: I'd like to have an Art Sale at my house within the next 2 months. Not only does it give me some time to work up a decent inventory, it also would be nice to have it during the cooler weather. If it caught on, I could have more and eventually, I could invite other local artists to participate. I think we all would love to sell directly. I can see clearly in my mind's eye:

Food and drink out on the front porch
A table with my jewelry and cake stands
Collage prints
Journals in baskets
Aprons hanging all around

If people have yard sales, why not an art sale? It would certainly be nice to get my name out there locally. Still, people are funny about selling so I'll be checking with the township to make sure it's OK before I start plastering my fliers all over town.

Here are some necklaces that I'll be putting on my Etsy Shop. The middle one is my grandfather and that one will not be for sale. BUT...I will use it as an example of custom work. Every time I wear him, I get a zillion compliments. I love having him near my heart :)